What Are the Odds of Finding Mr. Right Online?

The odds of finding your “soul-mate” online are a lot better than you may think. It doesn’t happen for everyone, of course, but it can happen for you. The world of internet or online dating has exploded over the last few years.

As our lives become busier and busier we need to make better use of our time and energy in our search for the one man who will make our lives complete.

The old saying, “You have to kiss a lot of frogs before you find a princess” is no longer true. Why kiss frogs when you can read hundreds of profiles and look at the pictures that go with them for a small monthly fee? That saves time and money…not to mention lip burn.

These are a few good reasons to consider online dating:
  1. There is a wide range of men to choose from. You aren’t limited to the men in your social circle or work environment.
  2. You have the opportunity to get to know a lot about a man before you ever contact him for the first time. You will know his age, marital status, what city he lives in, whether he has children, his height/weight and his likes and dislikes all from his profile. You’ll even see a picture of him.
  3. You have a better chance to present yourself in a favorable way. This is especially useful for those of us who are shy. We have time to think about how we want to say things about ourselves and can avoid being tongue tied. Even those who are more extroverted can take time to reflect on who they really are before writing their online profile.
  4. Online dating is certainly a time saver. You can meet so many more men in a lot less time than you ever could out in the real world.

Online Flirting – A New Art Form

Many of the same things work for online flirting that work for “brick and mortar” flirting and all relationships begin with successful flirting. Flirting is an art that requires oozing confidence without being OTT.

If you go too far, she will label you “slimy” If you don’t go far enough, she will label you “wimpy”. So how do you achieve that point half way between slimy and wimpy and do it online without using eye contact or body language? All you have is a computer an internet connection and membership in an online dating site, right?
  1. Have fun! Be light-hearted, funny and entertaining. Make her eager to talk to you again. Flirting is playful.
  2. Ooze confidence. Successful flirts have a positive outlook on life. You need to transmit the “feel good” factor. An optimistic attitude attracts females like honey attracts flies.
  3. Compliment her…and do it often and sincerely. Nothing opens doors like making her feel good about herself. She will want to spend more time with you and if she pays you a compliment say “thank you”. Do Not be self depreciating.
  4. Listen…listen….listen. Pay attention to what she says and ask appropriate questions. Get her to open up and talk about herself. Make her feel like she is interesting and that you are interested in her. Works wonders!
  5. Don’t be rude. Flirting does not include being sexually explicit nor taking offence if the lady isn’t responding to you. If she isn’t interested, take the hint and move on to the next prospect. If you get a lot of rejections, you should probably consider a different approach.
  6. Send an email after you chat. This ranks right up there with sending a thank you note for a gift and it is vital to successful flirting.
Don’t try to go too fast. Flirting is the first step to a successful relationship.

Online Dating Safety For Men

Almost everything you read about online dating safety is directed at women but men need to be concerned as well. Perverts, sexual predators and weirdoes come in both sexes, all sizes, and all ages…as do, liars and cheaters. So men need to stay on guard, too.

It is common knowledge not to readily give out personal information to strangers. The reason for not doing so is as large as the number of strangers who want that information. If you come across a person who is giving out personal information and asking others to do the same, don’t do it. You don’t know what they want to use it for….and you had better believe they want to use it for something. That “something” will not be for your benefit. Men, also, need to guard their real names, addresses, phone numbers, and place of employment. Do not give that information to anyone online until you are confident that they are who they say they are.

Men, be wary of women who seem too financially needy. If they ask for money, in any of a dozen ways women can ask for money, cut the relationship off immediately. They are not looking for love or even friendship….they are looking for financial help.

If a woman gives you a contact number but you cannot ever reach her at that number, beware. If you always have to page them or text them and have them call you back, this could be a sign that what they are telling you is not the complete truth.

A need to get married and insecurity are other signs men should be very wary of. If the woman is pushing too hard for a commitment you aren’t ready to make, it might be a good time to head for the nearest exit.

Where to Go on Your First Date

Where should you go on Your first date? This is one of the age-old question when it comes to dating. In the prehistoric times cave men had it made. This cavemen once firmly believed in kidnapping and taking their date to a filthy cave out in the middle of nowhere. But those were what was known as the good old days. Nowadays first date destinations and plans are a little trickier. First let’s cover where NOT to go on a first date.

The old standby of dinner and a movie is a really poor choice for a first date. How will you get to know the lady if you are sitting in a darkened theater with a movie being shown? If you choose the movie, there is probably going to be a lot of frantic car chases and a lot of blood involved. Neither are conducive to creating a memorable evening.

Also, don’t take your date to your parent’s house! She will know right away that you are a mama’s boy and you will never see her again.

Don’t take your date to a sleazy bar with a motel out back. You will scare the poor woman to death. She will jump out of the car and hitchhike back to town believing that she would be safer with a burly truck driver than with you.
Now, some good first date ideas are:

Begin with a simple lunch or coffee date. You want to keep the date casual so suggesting meeting up for lunch or coffee can be a good start. This way, if the date didn’t go so well, you can end the date there but if you enjoy each other company, you have the rest of the day to spend getting to know each other better.

Here are some ideas of where to go if the lunch or coffee date tells you’re there is some good chemistry happening:

If it is the season, an amusement park or a theme park is a good first date idea. It doesn’t matter how old you are, we can all be big kids at heart. There’re so much you can do at amusement parks and theme parks that most likely you will forget about the dating pressure and just have fun.

Most well populated areas have an array of museums covering many different subjects. Visiting one that is dedicated to something that you have in common with the woman is another good first date idea.

The Advantages of Online Dating for Women

In the past, i.e. the 1990’s, online dating was a brand new idea. Unlike today, most people did not own PC’s or even have access to the internet. Times have changed. Online dating is not only IN the mainstream, it IS the mainstream.

There are many reasons for the phenomenal growth of online dating sites and the number of people, men and women of all ages, races and religions who use them as their primary source for meeting people and looking for “the one”.

If you don’t believe me, just ask your friends in the “real” world. If they are honest, most of them will tell you they have or are using an online dating service.

Here are three good reasons why thousands of people sign up for dating services everyday:
  1. You can be anonymous. You will never be required to give your real name, address, email address, phone number or place of employment to another online user. You, of course, may do so but only at your own discretion and only when you feel completely safe. You are not required to post a picture of yourself. Posting a picture, however, will get more responses to your profile. So you can surf through the other members on the dating site you have joined with complete anonymity.
  2. You have so many more choices online that you do in your brick and mortar world. Before the world of online dating came of age, the choice of friends and even of lifetime partners was limited to those we came in contact with through college or work. No more…the world is your oyster. You can go through hundreds…even thousands of profiles to find the right man for you.
  3. The “safety factor” is the biggest reason of all. An online dating service will never reveal your personal information. You get to choose who has that information and when they have it.

Online Dating Safety for Women

Online dating can be a fun and certainly a rewarding experience for women of all ages. Maintaining your safety while doing it is simply a combination of using common sense and exercising good judgment. Online safety rules are the same as real world safety rules.

You wouldn’t give your name, address and phone number to a strange man that you met in a bar or on the street so you should never do that online either. Play it safe. Get to know this man who could turn out to be Prince Charming before you give out any information that could make it possible for him or others to trace you.

Don’t tell a stranger exactly where you work. Say that you are a legal secretary (if that’s what you are) for a mid-sized law firm….not that you work for Brown, Smith and Jones Attorneys-at-law. It is safe to tell him what city you live in but you should wait to be any more specific than that until you have been chatting and exchanging emails for awhile.

Use only the tools provided by the dating service you belong to. Most offer chat and private email on their site. Do not give out your isp email address. If you must give out an email address make it a free one such as Hotmail or Yahoo. Your isp address is traceable for anyone who wants to go to the trouble.

When the time comes for you to have your first face-to-face, make that first meeting in a public place and during day light hours. Take a friend with you or arrange for one to call you on your cell soon after the arranged meeting.

Remember…you ARE in control so do not let anyone pressure you into revealing more personal information than you are comfortable with revealing.

Online Dating Is Not A Contest

Online dating is not a competition between competing males for the attention of a female. Grow up. Change your mind set from “winning” to “searching”. This isn’t high school.

You are all grown up and have been for quite some time, now. Your attitude is the most important asset you have. You should like yourself and not concentrate of all of the things that aren’t YOUR idea of the perfect guy…the one the all women want.

What is that women want, you ask? That’s the age old question. Being of the female persuasion myself, I can tell you a few things women want and don’t want.

Women want a man to be confident…NOT an arrogant jerk. There’s a big difference. You need to like yourself and not be self depreciating but you don’t need to come across like you believe that you are a gift to them from God and have just fallen from the sky. They don’t want you to think that THEY just fell from heaven and are some kind of perfect being, either. They can’t live up to that expectation.

Women want a communicator. The “strong silent type” really isn’t appealing at all. They think you probably don’t have an original thought in your head and you probably haven’t heard a word they said, either or that you just don’t care what they said or didn’t even hear what they said. They want you to be interesting enough to want to know more about you and they want you to think that they are interesting enough to ask intelligent questions about what is important to them, too.

Women do NOT want to be a prize to be won. They don’t want to be a trophy. They want to be the ONE woman that you want to be with.